The Brexit song


A cabaret Brexit song is hitting social media.  Performed by Amanda Palmer, Sarah-Louise Young, and Maxim Melton, it’s available for download to raise money for a non-profit organisation that provides access to music lessons and instruments to refugees.

You might find it funny, or it might make you want to weep in a dark corner…

Here are the words in full:

Oh England, you broke our heart
When you first voted to depart
But before you off and pack, one thing
We want our language back

Oh England, you went your way
But for this exit you will pay
Without French letters you’ll be lost
It’s time for you to count la cost

No you can’t have joie de vivre without le français
You’ll lose yourself without our cul-de-sac
There is no fizz without champagne
Though you can gladly keep your rain
We’re taking all our French words back

No, you cannot drive a car without a chauffeur
There’s no déjà-vu without déjà vu
What’s sex without its lingerie?
Piers Morgan without his toupée
We really feel miserable for you

Oh England, you’re such a fool
Did they teach you nothing at school
With politics you’ve been risqué
For Brexit is just an entrée

Yes England, this is the start
Of picking allies à la carte
Soon the whole world will turn on you
It isn’t nice, but it is true

Cause you cannot rendez-vous without le francais
So many things that you will sorely miss
Like etiquette and ambulance
Without us you don’t stand a chance
You’ll die without our life saving French kiss

Key change!

No you can’t have marriage without fiancé
Without us your soufflé will never rise
Don’t bother to RSVP
We’ve buggered off for après ski
You didn’t get an invite, quelle surprise

Your cheeseboard will be blue without
Roquefort and camembert
When you can’t find the menu
You won’t, because it isn’t there
When you smell of faint regret
Instead of fine eau de cologne
You only have yourselves to blame
For dining all alone

No you can’t eat à la mode without le francais
You’ll have to scoff it all off one big plate
Alas there will be no encore
Now that you’ve bolted your back door
For a referendum you will have to wait

And if you want our bel esprit
I’m sorry darling, c’est la vie
You should have voted stay, it is too late
Yes, you should have voted stay it is too late

Written by Sarah-Louise Young and Maxim Melton
Starring La Poule Plombeé, Amanda Palmer, Maxim Melton, and Matt Skully
Producer: Maxim Melton
Music recorded at Buffalo Studio, London by JB Pilon
Mastered by Jherek Bischoff